Delush Diva, Siwe Thusi on mastering confidence
Confidence is a tricky topic. Too much of it can easily be misread as arrogance. I guess the trick is to work out what the healthy confidence balance is.
I think I finally mastered this balance, and, without it, I might not have entered the Delush Diva Search in 2017.
The brief was simple. Delush was looking for someone in her element, much like the wine itself – bold and confident.
So what does it look like to be confidently in your element? At the core of confidence is the ability to be self-aware and self-assured.
1. Know yourself
Be honest about what you like and what you don’t like. Confidence is not about always being right. You also have to be accountable for the many times you were wrong. Be willing to learn new things about yourself along the way.
“In my 20s I struggled so much with this. I thought I knew myself, instead of actually doing the work.”
2. Back yourself
Being self-assured means knowing how valid you are. Your opinions, dreams, wants and desires are valid and they matter. You do not have to receive validation from others. I back myself every single day at work and at home.
“Believe it or not, I am an introvert, but that does not mean I am not confident. I can be very sociable in a room, but in pockets of time I will sit and observe.”
3. Be comfortable
On the outside, confidence is the extra layer of skin you wear on top of your real one. It’s being “comfortable in your own skin”, as the saying goes. It shows up in the way you carry yourself over and above your clothes, your style, your make-up, your hair and all the treats you give yourself.
4. Be open
Being a photographer has also helped with my confidence. If you think about it, a photographer always has to break the ice and ask for a picture. And maybe that’s also where confidence lies. In just being plain friendly and open to people. It goes a long way!
All in all, confidence is something that has to start inside. It will radiate outside effortlessly and soon it draws people closer to you.